What Is The Secret To A Successful Relationship?
What is the secret, or the key ingredient to keeping your love alive? Is it maintaining a healthy sex life? Building trust in each other? A mutual dislike of Brussels sprouts?
Love is a variable thing, something that often changes. I know after 24 years of marriage, the love I have for my husband today is entirely different to when we first met, but the secret to love is not to let it fade, but to keep building on your ever-evolving relationship.
As necessary as the above factors might be (well, with the possible exception of the Brussels sprouts), there is one major factor, which is often an overlooked element, which any relationship needs to thrive.
So what is the secret?
Bring out your inner child and learn to laugh and play together.
Playing together is often neglected in relationships, but it is a vitally important aspect relationship to keep it healthy. Play is usually defined as sharing moments of fun or laughter with your partner by doing the things you love to do together.
But I am often asked how to add more fun to the relationship.
Why not start by scheduling time with your partner, a play date together? Plan an activity that you both will love to do. Simon and I went sky diving last year and have just returned from a fun holiday in Bali together. Work out what you both love to do. We love to dance and often go out (especially when 80's music is involved) to dance and laugh together.
To work out what you both love to do, make some time to chat. Ask each other what you would like to do that is fun. Think back to a time you both did have fun. What adventures do you have on your bucket list?
Your playdate isn't the only way to have fun. To learn about seven more ways, read the book called Eight Dates, by John Gottman, Julie Schwartz Gottman, Doug Abrams and Rachel Carlton Abrams, which helps couples navigate the ups and downs of relationships. This book is for couples looking to bring a touch of romance back into their relationships. Why not unlock both of your innermost desires and needs by going out on the themed dates set out in this book? What have you got to lose? But more so, what do you have to look forward to, including the laugh lines?
Cheers to more love and laughter in your relationships.
What do you do to play with your partner? We would love to hear your comments below.