The Six Different Types of Love
Finding love these days can be tricky, especially after spending days trawling through profiles on dating sites and spending countless evenings on awkward and unsuccessful dates, only to end up where you began - alone.
Why is it so hard to find your special someone?
After reading the book "How Should We Live?" by Roman Krznaric, I realised there isn't one concept of love. Roman explains in the book that maybe we need to take some advice from the ancient Greeks, who had a much better approach to finding love.
The ancient Greeks believed that love took six distinct forms:
Eros, the fiery, passionate love you feel toward a lover.
Philia, the platonic love between friends and family.
Ludus, the playfulness found among new lovers and children.
Pragma, the deep understanding between partners that grow over time.
Agape, the selfless, charitable love for our fellow humans.
Philautia, the love of the self.
Rather than relying on your partner to satisfy all these needs, the ancient Greeks believed you can have different people in your life could fulfil each of the roles, including friendships, which allows you to spread your emotional needs across a wide range of different relationships, thus fulfilling your six distinct forms of love.
So, if you're unlucky in love, or feel like something is missing in your life, why not take a tip from the ancient Greeks and start looking for love and affection from more than one person? Maybe it is time to embrace over two thousand years of history and look for various individuals to fill your emotional needs through a romantic relationship and several platonic friendships.
“How Should We Live?” gives a wide-lensed view of why we Westerners tend to think the way we do. From love to work to death, it explains how our modern-day views evolved and offers some age-old advice on how we might improve them.
Krznaric gives suggestions on how to embrace and engage your empathy, so you can change your perspectives and have a positive effect on the lives of others too.
He explains how you can find a source of purpose in many things you do, including your career, by employing your full skill set, rather than only specialising in a limited range of tasks you are good at.
He discusses how to limit your short-term thinking by not being so concerned with the immediate future.
An exciting read you will find as fascinating as I did. Even though I have been in a relationship with my gorgeous guy for over twenty-five years, my love is spread out between us and my friends, family and children.
I hope you enjoy love in as many ways you can, every day, including self-love.
Carolyn Rowland is a qualified NLP Master Therapist, Advanced Practitioner of Matrix Therapies, Time Line Therapist, Practitioner of Hypnotherapy, has a Diploma for Business and Life Coaching and A Professional Image Stylist. Carolyn is happily married to her husband Simon, and raised four beautiful children, who are now young adults and a teenager.