Cazinc is a collective of Melbourne bloggers that explores culture in many forms – from fashion and style, travel, lifestyle and wellbeing, to the culinary and decorative arts.

 

Learn To Date With Your Own Rules

Learn To Date With Your Own Rules

Recently, I met gorgeous Nadia from Married At First Sight. Nadia was one of my favourite brides on the show because she always maintained her standards, no matter what others said.  When I asked her to speak about her experience on camera for Cazinc Blog, she was happy to do so.

 Gorgeous Nadia, John and Moi from MAFS.

Gorgeous Nadia, John and Moi from MAFS.

I personally have been saddened to hear from women (those I have met professionally, friends of mine and my children’s friends, and even through watching women on national television), that they think there is an expectation to be intimate with men because you are dating, even on the first date.

Now please note guys, this is not a man bashing article. Not all men have expectations at the end of a date.  There are still gentlemen out there.  

But what has shocked me is that often it is the women who have been the instigator of the intimacy. They are seeking and needing approval from the man, as they are not confident in who they are as a woman, or confident about how they look.  Having their “offer” of intimacy accepted “validates” them as a woman. Unfortunately, this is intimacy they often regret later, especially when the guy never wants to see them again. 

For Nadia, she received a lot of backlash when she decided not to kiss the groom.  She knew when she signed up to go on MAFS that there would be social expectations, but she decided that to get married, she didn’t have to be intimate with her partner until, or when, she chose to.

On the show we saw Nadia’s “husband” put her down, calling her names and commenting negatively on her body parts.  Nadia is a strong woman but felt even more empowered and lucky with the support of fellow contestants and viewers.

We wanted to write this article and make the video (below) to show all women, especially those who are not feeling great about themselves and dating, that you do have a choice.  You can say “No”.  Please, don’t lower your standards or expectations through pressure of peers or your date or just because you think it will validate you as a woman to “do what is expected”.

Many people who have seen photos of Nadia and I on social media have asked what happened since the show, as they all loved her and didn’t like the way she was treated.  I am happy to say that Nadia has found true love with a wonderful man who loves her back just as equally, and she is shining from the inside out and outside in.

Thank you so much Nadia for sharing your experience with us.

Enjoy our quick video and please share around to spread Nadia's important message.

Carolyn Rowland is a qualified NLP Master Therapist, Advanced Practitioner of Matrix Therapies, Time Line Therapist, Practitioner of Hypnotherapy, has a Diploma for Business and Life Coaching and A Professional Image Stylist.  Carolyn is happily married to her husband Simon, and raised four beautiful children, who are now young adults and a teenager.

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