How To Put The Spark Back Into Your Relationship

How To Put The Spark Back Into Your Relationship

There are men and women out there screaming for their partner to communicate with them, show interest and to make them feel loved, wanted and needed.

So many couples go through life yearning for attention.  What happens is if they are not receiving the attention from the one they love at home, someone else gives them the attention they are craving, and it often leads to an affair or a breakup.  It makes me sad because they don’t often want to go off with the person showering them with attention, they just want some attention from their partner, the one they truly love.  They want you to be their rock.  

There has never been a couple who shower each other with love and attention that breaks up.

So here are five ways you can start to communicate how much you love each other.  Start to do this daily and put the spark back into your relationship.

1.    With spoken words. 

  • You talk to each other a lot.  
  • You lie in bed looking at each other and talk.
  • You go on date nights, where you feel you are the only two people in the room and talk.
  • You always use a gentle tone with each other.
  • You leave each other beautiful voicemails each day.
  • You say kind, loving, supportive and understanding words to each other every day.
  • When they open up to you, say “Tell me more about that.”  Never change the topic or fob them off.
  • Say words that show you hold your partner in high regards.
  • You say:
  • “I love you” a lot.  
  • “You’re my guy/girl”.  
  • “You are so gorgeous/beautiful that I can’t take my eyes off you”. 
  • “I have always loved/adored you.”

2.    With your face. 

  • You smile at them for no particular reason, just smile at them.
  • When they smile at you, smile back and hold the smile.
  • Let your eyes light up when they walk in the room.
  • When they are talking to you, look at them and show attention and interest in your face.
  • No matter what they are going through, or are at, make sure your face is there for them. Empathetic and expressive, like a mirror that reflects back the love they need at this moment.
  • When they are not feeling well or just having a terrible moment, show a kindness and caring face.
  • When they are all dressed up and made an effort, or just everyday style, there is a glint of love in your eye.

3.    With your body. 

  • For no particular reason, just take them in your arms and hug them every day and enwrap them in all your love and strength.
  • Hold their hand when you are walking together.
  • Show you care and put your hand on their knee when you are sitting together on the couch, at the movies, in the car.
  • If they are down or crying, don’t try to solve the problem.  Just hold your partner, tell them they are loved and how wonderful/ beautiful they are.
  • Massage each other often.  Feet, shoulders, head or back.
  • When standing, rub your hand up and down their back.
  • Touch them on impulse, no matter where you are.  Feel your partners back, arm, cheek, just to connect with them, to let them know you are connected with them and love them.
  • Grab them and start to slow dance around the house for no particular reason.
  • When it’s time for sex, make love to them.  Serve them sexually by making long, heavenly love together.

4.    With written words. 

  • Write little notes to each other.  Place in lunch boxes, on the car windscreen, anywhere.  
  • Leave little thank you notes, think of things you can thank your partner.
  • Celebrate birthdays, anniversary cards, holiday cards, Valentine’s day cards, (yes, I know it is American, but women especially love romance and feel sad when they are left out on Valentine’s Day).
  • Write to them and let them know they are a beautiful wife/husband to you.  Celebrate their existence with a few words and do it often.
  • Text and email them often, just to let them know you are thinking of them.
  • Now and then, when the impulse strikes, you write them long, loving letters, admiring all their excellent qualities and expressing your deep love and devotion to them. 

5.    With your actions. 

  • When you’re in doubt about what to do or not to do in your life, you remember that you have dedicated and devoted in your life to each other, and then you act accordingly. 
  • Everything you do, every behaviour, every act you perform, whether it’s in their presence or not, you do it with your partner mind. 
  • Think about what effect will this action have on their feelings or life? 
  • Ask yourself if what you are doing is a service or a disservice to them? 
  • Is it loyalty or disloyalty? 
  • Will it please or displease them? 
  • In this way, you stay connected to each other in all that you do on this planet, you do lots of nice things for them – gentlemanly/womanly things, helping hands, acts of kindness, civilities, considerations. 
  • Huge things like sitting down with them and helping map out a strategy to get the promotion they want, build a company or helping them reorganise the filing cabinet.
  • Shop, cook and clean up together.  It goes from a chore to fun when you organise and perform together.
  • The little things like helping put away the groceries, hang out or fold the washing, fill their car with fuel, take the kids out to give them free time.  
  • Organise things together, like date nights, go out for breakfast, go for a walk or to the movies.  Even arrange a holiday together.
  • Organise to take each other to unusual places.
  • Treat them like a lady/man.
  • Encourage your partner to tell you what they need from you and fall over yourself trying to provide it.
  • Set short term goals and long term goals together.


How do you communicate with your partner?  Or do you talk with your spouse?  Is this something you would like to happen more in your home?  We would love to hear from you; please leave a comment.

Here is to happier, loving and romantic relationships.  Kindness brings compassion.  When you find self-love in your life, you can love others.

Please enjoy reading with your partner.  Print it up and place on your fridge.  Show your children so they can learn how to love their partners.  Share the love with everyone so we can keep sharing our love with you.

How To Be Your Own Cheerleader?

How To Be Your Own Cheerleader?

7 Techniques For Great Self-Motivation

7 Techniques For Great Self-Motivation