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How To Cease Being a Chronic Worrier

How To Cease Being a Chronic Worrier

Once upon a time, I was a chronic worrier, always anxious about my marriage, finances, making a fool out of myself when meeting anyone.  My major worry was about my children.  Being a mother of 4, I always worried about their welfare, especially while at school, then when they achieved their license’s it was a whole different ball game.

Fact is, one study showed that 38% of people admit they are chronic worriers, being worried all their lives.  What is interesting though, is they can’t pinpoint what they are worried about.

What are you worried about right now? Your family, health, career, or something happening right not, like being late for work, missing the train, or the “how to” question, how will I do this? 

Ok, this is pretty full on way to start an article, asking you to think about your worries isn’t exactly pleasant, but please hang in there with me a moment. 

We all worry, it can be in our conscious, or unconscious mind, but seriously, worry can be a real time waster, and can also lead to stress.  But one thing I have discovered with all the therapy work is:

“Fact is, what you are worried about is highly probable that it will never come true.”

I developed a saying, “90% of what you worry about won’t come true”.  It has become our families’ mantra.  When we are worried and stressed, we use this mantra to shift our minds.  This also worked with many of my therapy clients.

Well, I was wrong.  One study at Cornell University asked participants to write down their worries for two weeks and record which ones came true. The results showed that a huge amount, about 85%, of those worries never manifested! 

The study suggested that approximately 97%, (not 90%), of worries are either exaggerations, or entirely made up. 

I am an old man and have known a great many troubles, but most of them never happened. 
— Mark Twain

There are many times we do worry, especially when it comes to health, or the health of a loved one, but what I discovered with most clients, their worries are about work.  They go to work and worry about their family, then when they are at home, they worry about work.  It is amazing how their lives have changed for the better when this was cleared, because what was happening wasn’t worry, it was guilt.  They wasted excessive time worrying, when the principal worry was time. Extremely unproductive.

Therefore, try to take your negative thoughts with a grain of salt for one week. Know that the chances of you missing the deadline, train, or even if you are a touch late to work, it won’t destroy your career. Such awareness will do your stress levels a world of good.  Try to use our mantra to shift your mind.

A great book to read is “The End of Stress” by Don Joseph Goewey. 

In this book, Don explains which three choices will support you to handle any stressful situation, and he teaches you four steps to rewire your brain.  A fabulous book I thoroughly recommend.

Wishing you all a stress free day, today and everyday.

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